Louisa, 44, is a nymphomaniac, she tells us about her crazy sex life

I’m in my 40s. I am divorced from a husband with whom I had become sober. It was a choice, at least a consequence: I was no longer in love and I no longer wanted him. The last two years of our marriage – which lasted fifteen years – we had sex only twice. What was surprising, which I did not understand so much, was that I no longer felt any sexual desire for any man. My libido hadn’t disappeared, actually. She was buried. I understood this when I met Antoine, who became my lover while I was going through a divorce.

“After a period of abstinence, I rediscovered my pleasure”

I met Antoine at a party. It clicked. He gave off something strong, he commanded respect. I fell in awe of him and it awakened something in me. We started dating and my desire resurfaced. I even felt the need to make love and these urges reassured me. Antoine trained me gently in the field of BDSM. I rediscovered my body so long extinct. I reappropriated it, I assumed my desires and my sexual pleasure. It is as if, deprived for too long, I had reconnected to myself… but times a thousand. Because before him, with my husband, I had a very ordinary sexuality, even without flavor.

“I have regular lovers and occasional lovers on weekdays“

With Antoine, our story lasted a year and a half. And I ran into Jonathan who I still am with. Maybe he could have woken me up too, but for me, Antoine was an essential stage in my sex life. The good meeting, the one that allowed me to get to know myself better and to open up to Jonathan, with whom we started a free relationship. We are libertines, we do not want to lock ourselves up. Rather, we seek to explore our sexuality. We need it, outside of our marriage or together with others. I have regular lovers and occasional weekdays lovers. And he sees other women, very frequently. We go out to clubs or saunas, we are swingers and we like group sex. Men, women. I’m bisexual. I also like to see him take other women, he likes to see me with others. We love these moments of great complicity and sharing. This is no problem for our couple, because we are neither exclusive nor jealous.

We love to play and we play adult games. For pleasure. It is not more complicated than that. Once you have known how to go beyond the norms and taboos of society, you can live your sex life to the fullest. We are not prisoners of our desires, but on the contrary totally free to flourish.

“I am always available and even insatiable”

I do not consider myself a nymphomaniac in the sense that we have of the word. For me, in my body, it is not a pathology. But I have a very active, very liberated, very free sexuality, perhaps bordering on nymphomania yes, at least in my way of being.

“A man without conversation does not attract me, except orgies or libertine clubs“

I am constantly looking for pleasure and have a very strong sexual appetite. A huge battery on that side. But he is not born by magic. My body is not the only one expressing itself. My head has a say too. It is both physical and psychological. I don’t jump on just anyone because I have a craving for sex. I like to play, I like to seduce. A man without conversation does not attract me, except orgies or libertine clubs. And like many women I imagine, I am sensitive to my hormonal cycle, and the period before ovulation is a “hot” period.

However, when it comes to Jonathan, yes, I love real urges that I need to satisfy. No time to think. By her side, I have a very strong sexual energy that frees me and makes me stronger. For him, I lubricate a lot and I am always available and even insatiable. He is my ideal sexual partner. We have hypersexuality. We make love about ten times a day when we are alone, a little less when the children are at home.

“Initially, my body did not follow”

Initially, when I made love three days in a row non-stop, I must admit that my body was not following. And it is surprising this gap between desire and achievement. The moment arrives when it is “less” possible, when the tool does not manage any more whereas it is him which claims in large part. But over time, I get “trained”. The body gets used to it. I spoke about it with my gynecologist who told me that no, there are no limits. It’s up to me to feel them if I’m exhausted, if I’m in pain. But today, things are going very well. I am aware of being a little apart, because I wet a lot, it is an advantage.

“A lover who doesn’t keep up with me won’t stay my lover“

My accomplice, he is always up for it too. And he too is extraordinary, he almost never disburses. But it often happened to me to have lovers who no longer had a hard time (even though they had given a lot!) And that can be frustrating for someone like me. Fortunately, they have hands and a mouth, because yes, I am the applicant. A lover who does not follow my rhythm does not remain my lover.

“I couldn’t do without sex anymore”

Some men are surprised by the way I move, a lot and loud, by my raw vocabulary and by the way I shout my pleasure. They are not used to a woman taking the lead. Some are so intimidated that they lose their erection. Too bad if it does not please everyone, too bad if my desire is “too much” compared to others. I do not compare myself, I do not try to enter a box, to put myself in order, to agree.

For me, this crazy desire which drives me and inhabits me is not a concern, because I impose no limits on myself and offer myself the right to live my sexuality as I see fit. I don’t feel any guilt. I take full advantage. I need sex and that’s it. And since I love sex, since it does me a lot of good, I don’t see why to contain or stifle my libido. I couldn’t do without sex, nor relive abstinence. However, I never wonder how I was able to do before to miss me, my body and my pleasure. I do not regret anything, because without these stages in my life I would not be who I am today, free and happy.