My love remained in the twentieth century: advice from old magazines on how to behave with my husband

We suggest recalling the recommendations of the last century publications on how to become an ideal wife.

Women at all times were worried about the question: how to find a good husband and how to build a happy marriage. Publications for the fair sex have always abounded in recommendations in this regard.

How to choose a husband

A detailed guide for women dreaming of family life was published in 1930 in Riga under the title “The Man You Should Not Marry”. Its author, Professor Gerling, took apart the representatives of the same sex to the bone and suggested that the ladies, when choosing a companion, trust not only their eyes, but also their ears.

“It is not recommended to marry a man whose voice unpleasantly resembles a dog barking. An equally unsuitable object for marriage is a man whose voice sounds like the sound of breaking glass.

After weeding out applicants with an unpleasant timbre, the woman was asked to make the chosen one laugh and listen carefully again.

“You should not marry a man who laughs like this:“ khe-he-he! ”. A kind and intelligent person never laughs like that. His laugh sounds like “ha ha ha!” This is the laugh of a person with an open and honest character, the laugh of a good person. Shrill, gasping laughter does no honor to a person: it testifies to cunning. “

See also: Through His Eyes – A Quick Guide to Marrying a Bachelor

Having laughed a lot, you can be sad together. At the same time, find out what type of character the potential groom belongs to. Of all the possible options, Gerling advises choosing a phlegmatic that differs “Unchanging calmness.” But he strongly recommends avoiding melancholic people – they “Always unhappy with the environment.”

But even if the beloved speaks in a pleasant voice, laughs “like a decent person” and does not show a tendency to despondency, his talent may prevent him from reaching the altar. Gerling warns women against marrying outstanding artists, writers and artists – people who are completely immersed in their work. Instead, he advises looking at men who have a goal. “To earn a decent life for his wife, and then for their offspring” and will “To give his wife gifts, take her to the theater and to rest wherever she wishes.”

According to the author, men who bite their nails, who are unable to walk past the mirror without admiring themselves, as well as the only children in the family, should not reach a happy ending. Well, and, of course, possessing addictions or defects.

What mistake do you make in your relationship with men? – take the test

From the remaining candidates, we delete overly self-confident, windy (“Changes her lover every week or more”), as well as those who are 12 or more years older than the bride. If, after checking for compliance with all these criteria, at least one representative of the opposite sex remains nearby – bingo! This is the perfect groom. It remains to make sure that he is smart and not inclined to lie – and run to the altar!

How to be the perfect wife

You have successfully completed the first part of the quest entitled “Marry Successfully”. But this is not enough – the husband must also be kept close, because there will be many who want to get such happiness for themselves.

In the 40s and 50s of the last century, women’s magazines were very categorical: the main job of a woman is to support the male ego. A woman should prepare for her husband’s return from work “Impeccable dinner” and “Ideal children” who will be washed, smart and quiet.

By this time, she herself must find time to put herself in order, weave an elegant ribbon into her hair and be ready to silently listen to her husband – if he even wants to talk to her. If not, you can safely continue to do household chores, previously “Lowering the volume of the washing machine and vacuum cleaner” (The Good Wife’s Guide, 1955).

See also: It is not worth starting – 5 things that cannot be changed in a man

Recommendations from domestic magazines differed little from foreign ones. Here are some tips you could read in a book on home economics published in the 60s and in the magazine Rabotnitsa in the 80s: “Never reproach your husband for anything. Instead of reproach, on rare occasions, cry without sobbing. “

Having burst into tears, remember how much effort you spent choosing him among the cunning and dishonest laughter. Immediately wipe away your tears and start laughing, especially, the authors of the advice are sure, men like it: “Always be in a good mood with him, laugh and smile more often, especially when he is joking. And don’t try to seem smarter than him. “

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But be careful: do not confuse his graceful wit with a serious conversation – and the husband, it turns out, sometimes wants to show off an intellect that is significantly (according to the authors) superior to yours.

Therefore, upon hearing that the betrothed is so frustrated by the inhomogeneity of the substance that you pass off as mashed potatoes that he is about to switch to invectives (write it down – it will come in handy for maintaining a smart conversation with your spouse) – do not rush to giggle, better use the following rule: “Don’t argue with him, keep quiet.”

All other advice comes down, in essence, to one thing: to please a man in everything, to anticipate his desires and forget about your own. And, of course, by now, most of these recommendations look ridiculous and ridiculous. But one piece of advice from Professor Gerling seems to outlive its author for a long time: “You don’t need to marry at all costs to tie a man. You need to find yourself a person, that is, a comrade, friend and defender, who will help to overcome the difficulties that are encountered on the path of life. ”

Ira Gromakovskaya

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